From Mormonism to Sex Work Empowerment - Mistress on the Mic with Mistress March feat. Molly The Mormon Stripper - MOTM S1E5

S1E5 - MotM - Molly P1

[: 00:00:04

Mistress March: Hi, and welcome back. I'm Mistress March. Today I have a very special guest in the studio with me, Molly, the Mormon stripper, and the owner of Molly's Gemini Room. So, Molly, tell everyone just a little bit about yourself.

[: 00:00:16

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I was Mormon. Till I was an adult. And then I got into stripping, well, I got into pole first and became pretty passionate about doing pole dancing, , as a hobby. And a creative outlet.

I was doing pole classes when I went through my divorce and I was a single mom, and lots of other things were going on.

And I remember telling one of my close friends, I can't afford pole anymore. It's too expensive. I'm working two jobs and I'm a single mom and I just can't, I don't have the time or the money to keep this hobby going. And she was like, you know, people will pay you to do this.

And I was like. Oh,

and I just had a light bulb moment, but I also was like, I can't do that. I could never, could I do that? And then I was just, I was in a shocked like, laughing mode and I was like, I could call myself Molly Mormon.

And I just thought it was so funny. Yeah.

[: 00:01:21

Molly the Mormon Stripper: And then I was like, I think we should go to the club and check it out. And she was like, yeah, okay, we'll go. And it's funny 'cause she ended up having this very strong guttural, like, I don't like this. Oh, wow. And, and she wasn't Mormon, which was interesting. And I was like, this is cool.

I like this. These ladies are hot. Which, you know, later I realized I was queer and so, yeah. And so maybe that's why it didn't bother me so much, you know, I was like, hmm mm-hmm Maybe like what you've done there. Okay,

[: 00:01:50

Molly the Mormon Stripper: So yeah, I ended up working at that club for like a year and then leaving that club and going and working at other clubs in Salt Lake City for like nine years after that.

And then, I eventually opened my own spot that did win Best Gentleman's Club for City Weekly, which was a big deal. Yeah, because my past club, one of my main past clubs had won it 16 years in a row.

Mistress March: Oh my goodness.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: So it was a scandal. Well, scandal,

Mistress March: that's that disruption we hear about from all these tech bros.

Turns out women are also very capable of disruption and progress.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: That's crazy. But yeah, it's been a wild ride. Start to finish. Yeah. Joining the industry and then becoming, a bar owner in the industry so that's a little snippet.

Mistress March: Yeah. We're gonna take a deeper dive too.

[: 00:02:39

Mistress March: So in this episode, we are going to talk about some of the things that we have in common, some of our similarities and differences. But one thing that we have in common, myself and Miss Molly here, we were both raised Mormon and we both now do things that are extremely taboo, not only for Mormons, but just to society in general.

So we're gonna dig into that arc. So let's start by going way, way back.

[: 00:03:06

Mistress March: What was it like for you in the beginning as, as a Mormon, especially as it relates to like sexual development and coming of age?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Mm-hmm. So I have those stories that a lot of women have, which are like the, the gum story, right? Uh, are you familiar with it should, yeah.

But

Mistress March: let's tell the listeners in case anyone is not traumatized in the specific way that we are. Yeah. Lots of things.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: The toothpaste story also. Yeah. Lots of messages in young women's about, you know, like, uh, what are object lessons? Is that what you call them?

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Uh, so they would pass around gum and then they'd see if someone else wanted to chew your gum.

And then you're like, that's what sexual sin is.

Mistress March: Like It's already been chewed. You're ruined.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. Great messaging. Um, or what's the nail one? You put a, a nail on a board and it's very jarring 'cause you're like a, you know, young person and someone in a very

quiet environment where you've been encouraged to be so reverent.

Yeah. And you know, like pounding a nail into a piece of wood and then. Being like, that's your sin. And then being like, you can take it out, but there's still a hole, um, a hole. There was already a hole there, there was already

a

Mistress March: hole there. It's all a biological myth rooted in oppression. It's terrible.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: And, and devaluing women who explore their sexuality or there are sexual in any way and fucking them up in a way that they can't even know how to have healthy sexual relationships. So,

Mistress March: yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Um, so yeah, I had of all, I have all those things. I'm trying to think if, if there's anything more like personalized.

Mistress March: So I remember the. The bishop's interviews. Mm-hmm. As a huge thing. Right? There are these conversations around sexuality, pleasure, even fantasies, even just having thoughts was so policed.

Mm-hmm.

And you were never supposed to talk about these things in any healthy, normal way. You were only supposed to, or be forced to talk about them in a private room with an old man who was like probably your neighbor and confess all of your sins. And then he would tell you how to repent. And I think that that is extremely problematic.

Did you ever have that experience?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. Did the interviews, let's see, I had weird ones as a young married person, 'cause I got married at like 19. Mm-hmm. So I had them say things like, no oral sex. And I was like, when we're married even. Yeah. What? Uh, the spirit leaves your home immediately if you have oral sex.

Wow. And me and my husband look at each other and you're like, we would never do that. That's disgusting. And then of course we were, um, but I also had, I had good mentorship somewhat around me. 'cause like I had had a brother-in-law who was in the bishop. He was a bishop when he was like 27. And I had lived with them growing up.

'cause I didn't live at home after like 13 on and off mostly. And so I had lived with them and I remember him saying things to me like in a group setting that were like topics like that would come up and he would be like, it is no one's business what you and your partner do behind closed doors. And so I already kinda had like a foundation of like not really thinking that way. Sure. Or some other point of view. Yeah. That I was like, I don't really think Ms. Bishop should be telling me what me and my husband do. Um,

Mistress March: and they're not experts. These are just, again, your neighbor who is working for free as a volunteer.

It's his God-given calling supposedly. But there's not specialized training or expertise. No. They're not counselors. They're not therapists.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: No. And I think it was the same one who said if, if there's like a, even a millisecond of porn in your house, like even if you saw it by accident or in a movie or something that Yeah.

You would need to like talk to him because the spirit couldn't dwell on your home.

Mistress March: Wow.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: And just, yeah, just how about you? Did you have those kind of things?

Mistress March: I did. I did a bit, but interestingly enough, and this is like the modern scandal for me, interestingly enough, I was not very sexual i n my adolescence and my young adulthood, during the time that I was Mormon, sexuality was not a part of my life.

I guess you could say. I was so fully bought into that purity culture or now knowing my kinks and fetishes, maybe I just was always so into tease and denial, for example, um, that the law of chastity as the Mormons call it was not really a problem or a temptation for me. Um, when I looked back,

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I had a lot of that. I was very naive. I was very like, when my friends, even when my Mormon friends started, like having sexual experiences, I was like, gross. Yeah. I was like, that is so, I can't imagine doing that. It wasn't even, I think even until I met my husband and he was my boyfriend, that I was like, oh, feelings Interesting.

Hmm. But, but a general same, like a, a little bit of asexuality maybe. Like, uh, maybe just, yeah, that, what was that a thing? I don't know. And yeah, repression, of course. Yeah. Um. Not really exploring things that were considered next to murder.

Murder.

Right. That's like, I can't remember which Bishop said that to me, but you know Yeah.

Sexual sins. Yeah.

Mistress March: The thing, the things that you're gonna lose, all of your blessings, all of your privileges, all of your secret, magic powers supposedly having the Holy Spirit for guidance, which of course

Molly the Mormon Stripper: you would tell women this. Yeah. 'cause a lot of their power lies there and you don't want them to have it.

So yeah.

Mistress March: Let's talk about that. Say more,

say more.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Um, women are powerful in general, but their sexuality, uh, keenly so, and so of course when trying to strip women of their power, that's the first thing you're gonna try and demoralize, is that the right word?

I think that's a great word. Yeah.

Um, because you're trying to keep them in servitude.

Yeah. So.

Mistress March: And not questioning, not exploring, not learning.

[: 00:09:09

Mistress March: For me, it was extremely pivotal when I did start to consider leaving the religion, I was, I was very analytical about it. There was this idea that you would lose the spirit if you sinned. And I had not really committed any of these major sins. So I'm in my early twenties and I decided to do a little experiment.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: To see if the spirit would leave?

Mistress March: Exactly like what will be different? Will I be less intelligent? Will I be less intuitive? Will I lose my magic? Will I lose my appeal? Gosh, I remember in college years I was. In this like personality psychology club. It was kind of culty. But the leader of that group told me after I had left the church and become like more liberated, he told me that I had lost my appeal because I had lost my virtue.

Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Oh my goodness. Which is funny 'cause he probably wanted you more than ever. Yeah, they're kidding.

Mistress March: Right? Wait until he hears this podcast and learns what I'm truly capable of.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: That's what's crazy to me is that the exact opposite has been shown True, true to me. About my desirability.

Yeah. Like the more sexual or slut am Which is funny 'cause I'm actually kind of in my personal life, fairly conservative sexually.

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: But open-minded or whatever.

Mistress March: Sure. Discerning.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: But just that like I would think that publicly being a stripper and taking my clothes off for money and being outwardly, behaviorally showing, uh, what's that called? Sluttiness? There's a better word, but I can't think of it. Um, sexual that like, I got options, yo.

Mistress March: Yeah, absolutely.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I can be picky. 'cause it's like

Mistress March: you reclaim your power instead of it being taken away from you and you're afraid of it. Exactly. And so you just pack it away in a closet or turn it off like a light switch when you take that power back '

Molly the Mormon Stripper: cause you're told that Yeah. No one's gonna want you now.

I'm like, that's crazy. 'Cause like I have very little interest in any of that, but I have lots of options.

Mistress March: Yeah, exactly. So owning our own power is, is key. But first we have to acknowledge that that power exists. Right. So back to my little experiment, I decided to choose a sin and then see if I felt any different and, oh.

Shockingly, I did not feel different in any negative ways. I only felt liberated. I decided to try drinking. At that point. I had left the country. I lived abroad on my own, and I came home for college and realized that it was actually really dangerous and naive. I didn't recognize the smell of alcohol at that point, like I had no idea it's the number one date rape drug.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. Did you know that?

Mistress March: And then on top of that, like I was so naive about alcohol that if somebody ever added something to my drink, I would have no idea. Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Because I didn't know the difference and I didn't know what it felt like to get tipsy, and I didn't know about that progression and what it's like to be drunk.

And I just, I had no idea. So I decided, okay, this is a matter of my safety, this is responsibility. I need to have some evidence, some personal experience.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I must partake Of the fruit. Yeah. Of the tree of knowledge.

Mistress March: Oh my gosh. And yeah, it literally just felt like knowledge. Mm-hmm. I felt like, oh, okay, that's an experience people are having.

I can now choose when and when I don't want to. And oh my goodness, there's no Magic Ghost in my ear that has now disappeared until I go talk to some old man in a room and do whatever he says. I just felt like I actually understood the world better and it really made me realize that I had missed out on so many life experiences.

So when I lived abroad, I lived in Italy and I never once tasted wine.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I was just thinking she lived abroad. Yeah. And didn't drink and yeah. Culturally that's like you're missing out.

Mistress March: No kidding. Right. And I got in a awesome relationship with a beautiful Italian man. Ended up even living with him for a couple months where there was a housing situation and never fool around.

I know you should sue for damages. Yeah. Missed opportunity Yeah, exactly. So that was my journey. What led to you leaving?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: So I was still a Mormon when I started dancing. Mm wow. In the clerb. And I told my bishop and he was like the sweetest, I think he had just gotten married and he was like 50. And he gave me the vibe that like, he had been a virgin till he was like 50 and just was really sweet and kind and like tiny little man. He gave like Eckhart Tole vibes. Do you know who that is? Mm, yeah. Very sweet and very kind and patient with me. It sounds like he

Mistress March: probably had genuinely good intentions too.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: A lot of people do. Majority. I agree. Right. Majority of people have pretty good intentions. Even if the, you know, road to hell is paved with good intentions you know?

Mistress March: Oh, it's not hell, it's outer darkness: Mormon deep cut. So you're, you have Eckhart Tole in a room. What's happening?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I didn't know if he was gonna try and do some disciplinary anything. But at that point I wasn't breaking any the other rules. Right. I wasn't having sex and I wasn't drinking or doing drugs or anything. Wow. And I was also paying tithing. Well, to me, and this was my work around as I'm like, oh, sports sex and swimming...Oh yeah: Pole athlete here. Uh, yeah.

Mistress March: This is a sport, so technically this is the appropriate clothing for that sport. And you've just progressed to a professional level.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. So I just, felt like I was covered all my bases. And then he, he wanted to meet with me weekly after that, which is kind of funny.

Right. Oh, bless his heart. He was worried for my soul. It definitely wasn't that he was aroused by the thought.

Mistress March: Definitely couldn't be both subconsciously or consciously.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: And so then I had these moments where. The cognitive dissonance was very painful. Mm-hmm. And I was feeling that , the conflicting values was eating me.

Hmm. And so I was like, well, one must be chosen. Yeah. And, and I was like, well, one of 'em making me really happy and financially secure.

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: One of 'em has given me a community. 'cause at that point I was gonna like the singles ward, but I wasn't, I was getting hit on a lot, but I wasn't being really welcomed, especially by the women.

So I wasn't, I had lost a community with the ward I was with and married. And then I was having not a very great community experience in the singles ward.

Mistress March: So did you get divorced before or after you started dancing?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yes, yes and no, because I divorced and remarried the same man.

Okay. And I was separated from him for like 10 years, so.

Mistress March: Oh, wow.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: That's a whole other thing. Yeah. So anyways, so I was actually married, technically most of the time I was dancing. But you know, like he was engaged and had another kid. And it's not like we were ever trying to work things out. And I had multiple long-term relationships.

So I was at the club and I was just feeling like, what should I do? And then I felt like, well, I have to make a choice. And so I made a choice and I told my bishop that I need to do this. I think he had a lot of compassion. 'Cause I think he understood like I was in need, you know, like for work and money and stuff, a nd at that point when I told him I, I didn't think I was gonna come anymore, he was like, okay, well you're gonna need to have a disciplinary counsel. And at that point I was like, I'm good, thank you.

Like, no thank you. I don't need that. And I never like removed my records or anything, mostly just 'cause I'm lazy and I don't care.

Mistress March: I'm the same, who needs more paperwork?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Exactly. Oh my gosh. And then I, had just a kind of journey with that and like believing in God and all those things, after that.

What was yours? What was your moment

Mistress March: My moment of leaving? So after my science experiment with alcohol, I decided to keep going and well, I decided to keep going with the experiments. I should clarify. I decided to stop going to church and keep going with the experiments and some other things unraveled.

Um, around that time in my life, I was kicked out of BYU and I the first time, gosh, this is a kind of a crazy deep cut, but the first time I had sex, it ended up making me find out that I had cancer. Yeah, crazy, right? So I had, I had like this mole on my upper inner thigh and I'd had the doctor check it out before he told me it, like it wasn't a problem.

So I thought it was fine. And then when I had sex for the first time, I did experience some tearing in a way that didn't heal on its own. And so I went back and my regular doctor wasn't available. So I saw a different doctor at the practice and he saw that mole and said, Hey, I think this is really concerning.

We need to get it checked. So weirdly enough, I had sex for the first time.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: And it saved your life.

Mistress March: And it saved my life. Yeah. Wow. Hmm. Maybe there's a catchphrase there. I lost my virginity.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: This is your biography

Mistress March: gained an entire life. Yeah, it's definitely one plot point. But my parents ended up finding out because I had, the doctor gave me a bunch of like birth control pamphlets and things.

When that happened, and they knew about the mole, they knew about the cancer scare, it turned out to be a form of like aggressive malignant melanoma that spreads through your lymph nodes. I'm totally okay now, I didn't have to do chemo or radiation. They just had some surgical procedures and it's fine.

So they knew about that side, but then the doctor had also given me like information about IUDs and condoms and things.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: How old were you, may I ask? I

Mistress March: think I was 21. Yeah. So I was still living at home at the time and. My parents found that, 'cause it was mixed in with all the other stuff.

I was still on my parents' insurance as well. And so that got kind of messy and complicated. And my parents are actually really fantastic. They're still Mormon, but I was the oldest child and I was always a trailblazer, always a boundary pusher. So we had our conflict and our fallout. But on the religion side, as I progressed through these experiences that I had been told would ruin my life and I realized that it was actually just opening up my horizon and helping me to understand the way the world works and experience relationships in a more normal way that everyone else around me actually had been experiencing growing up.

I p rocessed very quickly through that cognitive dissonance. The whole construct crumbled for me, and I've always been extremely extroverted, so the social side of it, I think is what keeps people in for so long. Mm-hmm.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: The community.

[: 00:20:15

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. Like I said, like I lost a community and that was so hard.

Mistress March: Exactly. And I, on some level, I still did. There were people that I chose to keep relationships with. And like I said, thankfully I still have great relationship with my direct immediate family.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: But you had a temporary falling out?

Mistress March: We had fights, we had differences of opinions, but we actually had some really interesting thought provoking conversations too, because I remember kind of challenging my parents' beliefs, especially at that time and saying, why do you believe this?

And if you look into the history, there are so many horrible, toxic things. And what makes you think that this is the truth? And personally, I just have to respect that they believe something that I don't believe mm-hmm.

At this point, right? So, yeah, that's a piece of my journey. It's a lifelong journey.

There have been so many things else along the way. Um. What about you? What was your family's response like?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: We're not from Utah, so I feel like that's really important to know. Yeah. Um, neither my parents are from Utah and we grew up in Atlanta, Georgia when I was young, so I do feel like they had a much more open mind about things.

So my mother was very upset. I don't remember having conversations really about leaving the church. I remember she was upset because in my car she had found my sexually oriented business license when I started dancing and to her this is like horror of horrors. This is the worst, this is the like, epitome of the worst thing that she could learn about me, you know?

So she was very upset and then she told my dad, and then for some reason I had a conversation with him at a later point. And he was like, oh yeah, your mom told me and my, it's a cute little story 'cause he just was so sweet and he just was like, I just don't wanna do or say anything that would alienate you.

And, and then he just was like, I love you so much. And I was like, that is the correct response.. Yep.

Mistress March: It, it took a little while, but years later I had this really beautiful conversation with my parents and they said something to the effect that like, according to their belief system, I'm not gonna go to the same part of heaven as they are. I'm not gonna make it to the celestial kingdom. But because of that belief system, they feel that our time together on earth, that this life is the time that we have together. So why would they wanna do anything that would push me away and lose that time that we do have?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah, that feels similar to, yeah, the energy of what, my mom was less like that, but my dad was more like that.

Mistress March: Okay. What about the rest of your family? And also, do they know, do they know what you do now?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: My family is mostly Mormon. I have one sister who, actually I got into the industry and danced in San Francisco and then the rest of my siblings, I'm the youngest of six and the rest are Mormon. Well, one has passed, so I assume he's in the celestial kingdom. But, um, anyways. They're really accepting. Like I said, I think there's just a different breed of Mormon in Utah. Mm-hmm. You know, like have you ever heard that joke that, uh, how do you keep a Mormon from drinking all your beer?

Mistress March: Invite another Mormon if, I don't know a lot of that, you know what I mean? That I, I know that's the perception. There's gotta be some truth to it, but I think that there are just different kinds of people.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Mm-hmm.

Mistress March: Whether you're from Utah or not. Or maybe my family is just freaks. Right. Yeah. Like, my family's not that way either, but I think of it in terms of Mormon doctrine.

Mm-hmm. Like Mormons believe, remember the war in heaven?

Mm-hmm.

So, quick cut for everybody listening there. Mormons believed that there was a war fought in heaven before we came down to Earth. And basically that war was fought over free agency, the right to make your own choices. And so for me, even if there was complete truth in the religion.

Shouldn't you respect other people's choices? They believe they fought on the side of the war, and in fact, they believe that because they're Mormon in this life, that means they were like a leader. They were a general in the war in heaven. Mm-hmm. So you're so committed to this cause that people should be able to make their own choices and that those choices are going to involve quote unquote right choices and wrong choices and sin and everything else.

If you believe in that principle, shouldn't you accept the fact that people, including your family, are gonna make choices that you disagree with?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. This is the critical thinking that is needed, b ut yeah, my family was pretty chill. I feel lucky. Um, like for example, when I opened my, my cabaret gentleman's club, I don't even know what to call it honestly.

Um, one of my Mormon sisters came and helped with everything and was there for the Grand Opening

Mistress March: Say what you want about Mormons. But we are taught to help out. We will put away the chairs, we will bring the food. Yeah. We are like event hosts to the max.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yes exactly, both two of my sisters came and, and my mom's been there, you know, like, uh, she hasn't been there like when it's open.

I don't know if she'd be comfortable with that, but Sure. But you know, very progressive. Very. But you know, then there's like a sibling I don't talk to anymore and have blocked and

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: and that's a conversation that was similar to one I had with my dad when he was constantly proselyting to me every time I saw him.

And one day I just was like, dad, that makes me really uncomfortable. Would you please not do that? And he never did it again, because he loves me. Even though he believes my eternal soul was at stake, I said, I don't like that, "That makes me uncomfortable" and he perceived that would not make us be able to spend time together and since I was uncomfortable. He cared about me being comfortable.

Mistress March: That's nice. That's beautiful. So way to listen. Interesting. It sounds like we actually both have the rare blessing of non-toxic father figures.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I don't know if I can say that and my dad's passed, so it's hard.

It's like, I think he was, as far as men go, very special and I definitely like, idolized him. I've been taught in therapy that you tend to do that with a parent and kind of villainize the other. And I definitely had him on this, like really high pedestal, and you know, the older I get and I have a daughter and I think about their dynamic and I'm like, I don't know if he wasn't toxic. You know what I mean? I think as far as the era he was in, he was very above average. Yeah. You know?

Mistress March: Yeah. But nobody's perfect. I definitely won't claim that.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: But yeah I can look back and be like, no, there were some things there that were not quite right. And I think a lot of that had to do with, the teachings of the church, and patriarchy in general.

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: But yeah, good guy. Good guy, but not perfect guy

Mistress March: So how did we get here? You started dancing, you left the church, and now you're fully immersed, you are surrounded by people. You own a business, you employ other people to do this work.

[: 00:27:20

Mistress March: So we talked a lot about growing up Mormon, but let's take a cut and let's talk about sex work. Yeah. Let's talk about working in the adult entertainment industry.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. I remember the exact moment that I looked up the word sex worker, and this is like seven years into dancing. Wow. And I was like, I am classified as a sex worker and then I started learning and understanding sex work, and then I was like, holy shit. My world has been kind of rocked by learning that word, learning that I was that word, and then trying to understand the WHORE-hierarchy.

Mistress March: Yeah. For the listeners out there who maybe haven't done as much research on this as we have, can you give a little 101 lesson?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. Hierarchy is like the hierarchy of sex workers, where just like we were taught in the systems we grew up in that like, depending on how I'm, I'm not gonna do this, great, but I'm gonna try

Mistress March: do your version -Tell us about version of the term.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Depending on how far you go sexually or what vein of sex work you're in. There's like a, oh, well, we're better than you. Because we do less sexually, therefore our value is higher. Which is what we were taught all growing up - the more you withhold your sexuality

Yeah. And the more tainted you are by sex, you're tainted, you're ruined, you're used up, you're so many other ugly things. And so, so yeah. Unpacking that. And I remember moments 'cause I'm, I feel like I'm logical to an extreme at times. And I remember being in the, in the dancer room, and I don't even remember if I learned the word sex work yet, but I just remember listening a lot.

That's what I've done a lot in the industry, is listen and observe. And that's kinda, I'm, I'm a deeply introverted person and so that was a lot of what I was doing. And one of the conversations I overheard was. You know, talking about so and so is a prostitute or this or that, and they can't be here.

There's even like rules and laws, or not laws necessarily, but a lot of clubs that like, don't let full sex workers in there.

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Or you know, just part of this whole narrative. And I remember listening and being like, that doesn't even make sense.

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Like, especially I think the person who was talking about it, I'm like, I'm positive this person sleeps with more people than any of the sex worker or like, full-service sex workers I've met.

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: And I just was like, how are you, how are, how?

Mistress March: It's, it's crazy. I mean, talk about cognitive dissonance. Like the idea is so normalized in society that someone will buy you dinner and then you owe them sex for that. That's insane. That scene is totally normal. That's just a part of like heteronormative vanilla courtship.

And it's toxic in it's own way for sure. But if they give you cash instead of paying. The restaurant, suddenly that's that exact same transaction of your time for their time sharing that intimacy, being valued for showing up and contributing, your body is seen as this horrible, ugly, nasty thing.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: And just, yeah, bizarre because so many women, I'm like, what is, what's more gross?

You giving it away all the time to people you don't even fucking know? Are these women very intentionally being selective and having these experiences where they are increasing their

Mistress March: options,

knowledge,

Molly the Mormon Stripper: lifestyle, um, yeah. Ability to be educated, being able to survive.

You know what I'm saying? So I remember thinking that way, and so it was very natural when I started to do research and realized, I was like, oh yeah, this is like hella fucked up.

Mistress March: Well, it's also. So poignant to me. When people feel that in a marriage a woman is obligated to have sex, to meet her husband's needs, that's quote unquote, that's definitely sex work.

Mm-hmm. If you're not working, he's the breadwinner. He supports you financially, he has control over the household in all matters financial, and you feel that you no longer get to say whether or not you're interested in having sex. You feel obligated in exchange for all of those financial things that you're receiving and everything else.

That's sex work.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah, in many situations, I would go even further to say it's sex slavery.

Mistress March: Yes.

It's bonkers. Mm-hmm. Okay. So you, you were overhearing conversations in the dressing room about this. Yeah. Let's, let's talk about the ways that women are basically affected by this system of oppression that we rip each other down within all of this.

[: 00:32:12

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. I'd love to talk about power 'cause like Yes, please. I started to learn about power in recent years because as a woman, I feel like I was very conditioned to be like "power? gross" to the point that like learning and reading about power, like turned my stomach.

Mistress March: Wow.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Like my response to it was kinda like, my friend in the strip club was like, I'm not conditioned to read about this. It just felt like reading a horror story, you know what I mean? Wow. And but a friend and suggested he's, he was like, you're very powerful. And I've been lucky enough to have mentors throughout my life and this was kind of a mentor who was like, you're very powerful.

I think you need to understand power. And I was like, I don't want to, I don't like it. Yucky. And. That same message just kept coming and coming until I was like, okay.

[: 00:33:04

Molly the Mormon Stripper: and I think I started to recognize how much power I had, like even in the club, because I got into the industry much later than most women.

So I'd already kind of had like a very wide experience of life.

Mistress March: I love the way you've spoken about this on your podcast: Ask The Stripper, you talked about you have life experience, you're not naive. You've seen things, you have some discernment. I still am based off of, but not, of course, it's a never ending journey, but, and you started in your thirties, right?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I was 29. Yeah. So coming into your thirties compared to women who started at 18 or 21? You know, I was much older and I did well right away. I had the work ethic and the aesthetic and the ability to entertain. I had, a background in acting, and had been in TV and film at that point.

I had a skillset that made me kind of instantly do well, and I had the dance skill too, and so I think being older and being someone who had success very quickly, I noticed.. Oh, these women, look up to me.

And I was like, shit. Don't follow me. I don't know where I'm going. You know?

[: 00:34:12

Mistress March: So where did you, you said you started reading about power. Where did you start?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Um, 48 laws. Have you read that?

Mistress March: I haven't yet. I need to. It's, it's also been coming up a lot. Would you recommend it?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I read, yeah. I read 48 Laws of Psychology.

I, so now I've read all of Robert Green's books. And not even because I necessarily agree with them as much as their knowledge. It kind of reminds me of your experiment. You know, it was like, well if power isn't bad and I actually need to find ways to operate within. Knowing that I have power and how to use power

I read 48 Laws of Psychology first. And that was a little bit of a, good intro. 'cause it's not, about power, about psychology. Mm-hmm. And then that made the next one a little more palatable and it's just well written and a lot of pulling from history.

Mm-hmm. And just talking about it. So not even like, I feel like it's all his opinion. It's just like, oh, well here's examples of what this is. Do you know what I mean?

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: And so, um,

Mistress March: I have a recommendation. What is it?

[: 00:35:14

Mistress March: Have you come across a Woman's Guide to Power Unbound?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I have read that.

Mistress March: Have you read it?

Kasia's book?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I follow her. I loved it. It was, extremely helpful. Her work is powerful and is helping keep women safe.

Mistress March: Yes. Yes.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Um, very, very good. Very good.

Mistress March: Yeah. Well, this, this book was amazing. , So life changing. And it really resonated deeply with me.

So I would highly recommend it to anyone. It also has really great exercises that you can do together with your friends or with other women. And it, it's a great one for a book club. For everyone who's listening, Kasia was a Daoist nun. Is, was, I don't know. Um, she,

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I think she was for 10 years.

Mistress March: Yeah. I, I thought it was like 17. So, anyway, for a long, long time, and she earned money as a dominatrix, and that was how she funded her studies. And so she has both of those lenses and she now, has programs around love and romance and empowerment. And some of it is through that lens of submission and dominance and understanding how to control the frame and manage interactions.

But she's incredible, incredibly powerful. Um, yeah, I definitely love to follow her. I had a very brief conversation with her recently and this summer I found out that she was one of my mentors' mentors. Whoa. Way. Cool. Like she's in the lineage. This, this all is clicking.

[: 00:36:40

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Um, did you have a natural aversion to power or like having it or learning about it, or was that not part of your experience?

Mistress March: Oh, that is such a good question, Molly. I have goosebumps. Um, one of my earliest memories. So you grew up with, with sisters and brothers, right? I grew up with all brothers and I remember people frequently telling me, listen, bossy pants, you think you're in charge now, but they're all gonna be bigger than you someday.

So from a very, very early age, I realized that I could establish dominance Now. And make sure that I was always in charge. So I'll say I was always very drawn to power. I am. You are the oldest. And I'm the youngest. Yeah. And that is a huge predictor of personalities.

Interesting. That's very true.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I think that has a lot to do with it for me.

And having a very strong aversion and be like, I do not wanna be in charge.

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: And then, and then realizing how powerful I was and it being like, oh, I don't like this.

Mistress March: Interesting. See, I'm not only am I the oldest sibling, I'm the oldest cousin on my mom's side. Oh yeah. And the oldest cousin on my dad's side.

And I was constantly being put in charge of all the other kids.

Mm-hmm.

Again, from a very young age. So I was always not my experience, always the babysitter. I was always the boss. I was like honestly so bossy to the adults.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I was being carried around - Like nobody put me down for the first like four years of my life I was like a little baby doll.

Mistress March: I was always carrying a baby.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. Which is funny 'cause like. Uh, that makes us very compatible. Yeah. Like in friendships or relationships. Interesting. Like youngest and oldest and then middles kind of match. I did a paper on it once, so I know lot about birth order. I'm curious to learn more about that, but definitely I had never really tied a lot into power and birth order.

and how they're powerful in their different ways.

Mistress March: Do you think that's by nature or by nurture? Because I think probably some of both. I just know that I was constantly being expected to be in power and I was also constantly praised for being good at it.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: That's not the experience I was having.

Mistress March: Yeah. It must have been the opposite. You were being taken care of and I was being praised for taking care of everyone who was smaller than me.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. One of the things that was not as good for me to experience that I still struggle with is I was definitely taught that my needs were not important.

Mistress March: Wow.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Even though I was babied and I was spoiled in a very specific way with love and attention. , It also was clear being the youngest of six children and then having two brothers who went into addiction I couldn't have needs because there's no space for that. And I learned that very, very young and I've had to try and unpack that. I feel like stepping into my power has been painful for me. Genuinely, emotionally, physically painful.

Yeah.

But I do feel like I'm meant to step into that. And I would love, especially for other women who feel that same aversion or reluctancy to.

Be like, you can do it. Yeah. Some encouragement. Yeah. And that, um, yeah.

Mistress March: Yeah. So back to the topic of sex work.

[: 00:40:03

Mistress March: Um, correct me if I'm wrong, I think both of us do not do full service sex work.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I usually choose not to say.

Mistress March: Yeah. I I keep things vague too. Okay. We'll cut this part out. Let me, I

Molly the Mormon Stripper: don't care if you do actually.

Okay. Like it's kind of intentional.

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Do you know what I mean?

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Like,

Mistress March: it's very intentional. Uh, in fact, let's talk about that.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah.

Mistress March: Can we talk about your reasons? And we'll talk about my reasons.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: My reasons are like, what does it matter?

Mistress March: Hmm.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: You know what I mean? Would it make someone see me differently or treat me differently?

I understand that the part that is visible of what I do is not full service, but I choose not to say whether or not I'm full service. Yeah.

Mistress March: So, the reason I bring it up is I would like to t alk about it through the lens of what we know happens. I know there are people in Utah who do full service sex work, and for anyone who's listening that doesn't know that term full service sex work means that there is sex on the table.

And of course sex can mean a lot of things, but it usually means PIV penis in vagina sex and that it is on a transactional monetary basis. Right. How would, how would you define full service sex work?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I think you said it perfectly, and I think, and I don't think I'm gonna have you remove this at all. I would say that I probably am full service because I have sugar daddies that I date.

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Um, and that is the only type of relationship I'm willing to entertain.

Mistress March: That's valid. And so I love a provider.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. And so at that point, I would say that is probably, a full- service, gray area, because it's not. I think considered illegal.

Mistress March: Well, this goes back to our original conversation too, of these things that are totally normalized can come full circle and what's the difference between a housewife and a prostitute?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: There's not one. If you actually look at the specifics, there's not one. Like you use the word provider, right? That's a very understood mainstream word, and yet what we're marginalizing the same thing. If you like, do it slightly differently, that doesn't make sense.

Mistress March: If you, if you speak about it more clearly, maybe if you're not too afraid, if you use different words, if you're not too afraid to negotiate and talk particulars and ask for what you want.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Mm-hmm. That was a trip for me , even starting in the industry this is literally how my personality was: I would feel bad when people tipped me. I would be like, oh, you don't have to. Like, I'm like, oh my gosh. The woman that that was, and the woman that is existing now are like night and day.

But you know, that went all the way to like put the money right here in my hand where it belongs. You know what I mean? Like, and so yeah. That's been an interesting evolution.

Mistress March: Getting comfortable, receiving and asking. Yeah. Receiving, though. Receiving. Receiving as a baseline, I think for most women is something that they're so uncomfortable with.

I know I've had times in my life, mostly in the past where I was uncomfortable, but something just as fundamental as receiving a compliment is very uncomfortable for a lot of people, and especially a lot of women, but then receiving something of value, receiving a gift. God forbid, receiving money.

What do owe them now? Yeah. Or what, what does, how greedy does it make me look?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: How greedy. Yeah. I'm trying to think of what else.

Mistress March: So yeah. Receiving and then the next level is asking and or taking, and there's definitely so much power in that journey. Do you have any examples of something that you never would've been comfortable with before, but it kind of gives you a thrill now as it relates to receiving and asking?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Um, there's a story that came to mind, which was like, I kinda had a peak of being aggressive in the industry. And then that peak kinda, you know, like most things, there was a pendulum swing and I remember getting to a point of someone, you know, touched my butt or something at the club and I like strong-armed them and was like, you need to pull out your wallet. I'm gonna need everything in it.

Mistress March: Mm-hmm.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: You know, like just moments of being very violent at times. But it's a hell of an industry, you know what I mean?

Mistress March: Well, they felt entitled to your body. And you felt entitled to their money after they felt entitled to your body

Molly the Mormon Stripper: after assaulting me, basically. I've kind of had a rollercoaster of that because my section of the industry as an entertainer, many customers can be problematic, but can be very lucrative. And, it's a very difficult industry because if every time someone acted poorly, you made them leave, you would not have a ton of people there. And you might be blocking someone's bag because you're not having a good interaction with someone.

Or maybe you don't know how to have good boundaries with someone you don't know how to like either avoid them because they're not someone you handle well.

How to just tell them I don't like to be talked to like that, or I don't like to be touched, but yeah. I don't know how it is in your part of the industry if I feel like you get to be more selective. Is that an assumption?

Mistress March: Uh, I think it's different for everyone. Personally, yeah. I am extremely selective. Yeah. And I also recognize that as a privilege.

I think there's a misconception where people think that a dominatrix or a stripper or any other type of sex worker, an escort even will do things for anyone who's willing to pay them to do those things. Like if it's on your menu. And for me, that's a big part of why I don't talk about what I do and don't do in explicit terms, is because nobody is entitled to it.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Mm-hmm.

Mistress March: Whatever I choose to experience with someone is absolutely on my terms, and it is very much on a case by case basis.

Of the interest I have in doing those things with that person, the amount of access I'm willing to give them to my attention span and my physical presence and so many other things. So for me, yes, it's extremely exclusive. I'm very choosy. And that's based on tons of different criteria. But I do think that there are also women who do this work who are in more of a position of doing it because they have to, and there can absolutely be that economic pressure and that fear that if you turn down this opportunity or this potential willing paying customer that you are not gonna be able to put food on the table.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Exactly. And now amplify that with working with other women, where now you don't want to offend any of their people.

And then the community smallish. So for example, I, I had a dancer who did offend a customer who was a good customer, and then that person went and told a huge customer about it. Do you know what I mean? And it was like a small thing. It wasn't a huge event or anything, but do you know what I mean?

That's heavy, that's pressure, um, how did that play out? I had told her, but not in like a very, you did something bad. Sure. I was like, I understand the interaction you had because I've had those interactions.

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: And, but I did want you to know that this is how that went.

Mm-hmm.

Um, and then the person didn't talk to me about it , the other person involved for a long time.

And to me I just was like, I'm not sure there wasn't anything for me to resolve. So I dunno if, you know, like 12 Steps or Al-Anon.

Mm-hmm.

But I was in that for a hot minute and I'm not anymore, but there's things I took away that really stick with me, which are like not fixing things that are like, not mine to fix.

Yeah. And not feeling that pressure to do that where I'm like, well, am I supposed to intervene here? Or like, where's my, where's my part? Um.

Mistress March: See another, another thing that's coming up for me is a huge part of what I do as a Domme is train men.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah.

Mistress March: So I'm in a construct where it is my job to tell you how to act, to tell you what to do with your body, what to not do with your body.

And I just imagine that working in a strip club, you are a lot more in a position of having to constantly decide whether to play along because they're on some level setting the tone and they're in control and you have to choose.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: But there's still a lot of training happening.

Mistress March: Tell, tell me more about that. What kind of training?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I think, I think all women are training men all the time on how to talk to them and how to interact with them. Yeah. Whether they realize it or not. Either.

Either in a very obvious way or in a very subtle way and I'm obviously, I think more submissive in a lot of ways.

So that's usually how I would just like people who disrespected me, I would be like, you don't exist anymore. I won't be rude to you. I won't be unkind, but like the world I live in, you're not there.

Mistress March: I will no longer acknowledge you.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I would actually acknowledge them because I don't wanna hurt anyone's money.

You know what I mean? But I got really good at just not even having to be faced with that part at all. Does that make sense? Like if there's someone I wanna avoid, I avoid them. Yeah. And so there isn't that moment, you know, see, but if the moment would happen, I would just be like, oh, hey, it's so good to see you.

Bye. Yeah. You know what I mean?

Mistress March: Like for me though, like my smile is a commodity to be earned. I like that.

I will tell you whether or not you are allowed to look at me.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I like that.

Mistress March: Or speak to me.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah.

Mistress March: In no uncertain terms. And there's a whole universe there. So it, it is. Again, a privilege that that's the construct that it's based upon.

That's the expectation everyone comes into it with, and

Molly the Mormon Stripper: that's why I'm very interested.

Mistress March: Yeah. I'm excited to share more with you

Molly the Mormon Stripper: because I've experienced some of that in my industry, like a sub and Domme energy.

, And trying to figure out, 'cause for us, like we have to figure out which one we're playing that night.

Sure. Because of course a lot of powerful men really love that and want that. Yeah. Um, and so we kind of have to be like, all right. And that's where also you had to figure out who do you not work with? Like, if you can't play sub or you can't play Domme

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Then you need to find a way to avoid that person so that they don't leave.

Do you know what I mean? Yeah. You're not the right fit. Yeah. You're not the right fit. But sometimes, a dancer will make that everyone's issue and that's hard 'cause Yeah. Most, not most every dancer I know is out here trying to survive. And pay their bills. Yeah. And like, I don't know anyone.

Well, no, there's occasionally what I feel like we call tourists, which are like women who don't really need the money, maybe have another job or a husband, whatever. And yeah, their energy is like deeply different than the majority of ours energy, which is like, I do this 'cause I have to, I might like it, I might feel occasionally empowered, but this is how I'm surviving.

And so the understanding with those other women is like, don't fuck with my bag. Okay. Don't alienate my customer. Don't ruin this for me. 'cause you don't like them. Yeah. Because you don't fit. So Yeah. It's a interesting world.

Mistress March: Yeah. Fem dom also, I think because of monetization it drives me crazy sometimes that most of the way that you see it portrayed is absolutely centered around catering to the male gaze. It's not centered around the woman's pleasure, it's centered around things that appeal to men.

Mm-hmm.

And it can even be especially online centered around like, who is the most attractive to men?

Who is getting the most attention? And I just want to opt out of that. It certainly does appeal to the male gaze and that will always be there, but it should never pander. That's not empowerment. I'm not playing the same game. You know what I mean?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. The thought I had when you're saying that, that I found fascinating is talking about aesthetic that some of the most successful dancers I've ever known were not what you would consider like stereotypically attractive.

So I just find that interesting that often it is sometimes the people who are not centering the male gaze and are really doing their own thing the way they want to and creating something that do well.

[: 00:52:27

Mistress March: Well, confidence is attractive.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yep.

Mistress March: And to everyone. Yeah. Absolutely. And across the board, undeniably confidence is attractive.

Passion is attractive. Competence being good at things is attractive. Yeah. It's like the hottest thing. And on top of that, diversity is attractive.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Mm-hmm.

Mistress March: Like the idea that everyone needs to look like the standard Barbie

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah.

Mistress March: Is not the truth.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I think that's one of the most common comments I get on my bar.

Molly's Gemini Room. I don't even know if I said that - gotta shout out. I'll make sure to plug it. But a lot of the clubs I have worked at did have certain standards that I'm like, we're in a garden. I don't wanna see one kind of flower. Yeah. You know what I mean? That sounds not as cool or not as entertaining or, yeah.

Um,

Mistress March: okay. So another thing that I loved that you've talked about in the very first episodes of your podcast,

Molly the Mormon Stripper: which was years ago. I know, and I'm so embarrassed.

[: 00:53:23

Mistress March: I know, I know. I've been doing the math to figure out like, okay, she said this then, so now, and I, I'm glad we're just finally sitting down to start talking, but you talked about the phenomenon where guys feel pressure to act like they want the same girl their friends do.

It's so weird. Let's talk about this because I think it's a real phenomenon.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Do you listen to Slumflower Hour? Oh my gosh. I think you would love her. Anyways, something she has said more recently, is that under patriarchy, men need to be connected to a woman that they feel gives them more power under patriarchy

Mistress March: is a status symbol because of her desirability to other men. Uhhuh.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. And therefore they're not even getting to be with the women they're most attracted to and having the sexual experience with the people they have real chemistry with or prefer for some reason.

In the club, the way that plays out is, being stereotypically beautiful. I've, watched men who like, I know who they've dated or they've told me privately what they prefer or. Just feel like a need to be performatively liking someone publicly.

Yeah.

And then liking something else behind closed doors, which is just classic.

Mistress March: Yeah. There's so much shame around I actually really like small tits, or I actually prefer brunettes, or I actually want someone to tell me what to do so I can have a break from what I do all day at work. Have the safety and security of feeling like I'm a good boy.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Mm-hmm.

Mistress March: There's a lot, there's a lot around that.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Mm-hmm.

Mistress March: Men definitely suffer under patriarchy too,

Molly the Mormon Stripper: so badly. But at the same time, I'm like, well then make it stop. Yeah. Opt out. And that's where, you know, I started to get into that. I'm like, I won't be with a man who's not doing reparations for me. Yeah.

Like, and I don't have any interest to be with a man who's not doing that. I'm like, the more I unpack this, if patriarchy's still happening. Then I don't see myself aligning with a man who's not doing that. Yeah. Anyways, yeah,

Mistress March: we could talk forever. We're going to talk forever.

[: 00:55:42

Mistress March: Um, I do wanna hit just a little bit deeper onto sex work and in Utah, I think that the perception for not everyone but the majority of people in Utah is that sex work is bad and wrong and illegal and it doesn't exist here or it only exists among the homeless people that you see on State Street or whatever.

But that is not the truth. So let's talk a little bit about what does exist here. Can you share some things that you know about and I'll share some things that I know about.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. So getting exposed to different kinds of sex workers through my industry or through the online communities, I was really, like I said, when I learned I was a sex worker and I was like, what?

And then, um. And then yeah. Meeting other people in those different parts of the industry. I was like, oh, these are like good ass people. Yeah. These are smart people. These are kind people. These are generous people. These are, creative people. And so, yeah, of course that's happening. The oldest industry in the world. Yeah, of course. In the most sexually repressed place in the world. Absolutely. .

Mistress March: What are some different scenarios that you've seen or heard of where someone will seek out a sex worker?

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Grief. I feel like when people are in grief, they seek out sex work, sex workers, even just like club entertainment. Mm-hmm. I feel like often it's grief, divorce, loss. And I would say isolation.

Mistress March: Isolation sometimes even before the divorce. Isolation, you're so isolated and Yeah. Feeling well,

Molly the Mormon Stripper: and I wouldn't say that's something I would've said my first few years.

Hmm. That was more like, the more I started realizing what was really behind it.

Yeah. Loneliness.

But also your brain needs entertainment. It literally does to function properly. It needs a certain percentage of your time to be in entertainment. So I think that's why a lot of people, you know, seek out sex workers.

Um, 'cause we're entertainers, right? Yeah. Or do you feel that way about yourself? Do you see yourself as an entertainer? Absolutely. Yeah. You're a performer. Yeah. I mean, I, I feel like that's how probably a lot of sex workers see themselves. Do you think I'm That's right.

Mistress March: Um, I think people probably relate to the terminology differently.

For me, it's not a contrived performance, it's a playful, interactive, authentic performance.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Well, good performers draw from a place of authenticity.

Mistress March: I guess. I'm a character actor.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I have felt like Molly has been a role this whole time and it can be very exhausting for me. Mm-hmm. Uh, to, I love her. She's an aspect of me.

She comes from a very genuine, authentic place for me, but I don't wanna play that part of myself all the time. Sure. That is really exhausting and just not the wholeness of the roles in my life, you know?

Mistress March: Yeah.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: But yeah. I think people come for entertainment, for companionship and honestly, yeah.

I don't know why grief stands out so much to me, but I just have these very poignant moments in time with people where very consistently getting to the core of why they were there was, I was like, oh, you're grieving. Yeah. And you want a woman who is soothing. Mm-hmm. Soothing balm.

Mistress March: Yeah. So I think at the core, at the core of it, it is assigning value to women's presence.

And their attention. Our attention. And when we are not being compensated for that invisible labor, the labor's still taking place. Always. Yeah. You're, if you're in the club, you're giving people permission to look at your body and to think about your body.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: And sometimes they don't tip you. Yeah. And sometimes they're not nice to you.

And it is like, when people talk about this industry, I'm like, it is difficult. I wouldn't ever tell someone not to do it because of like, oh, no, no, it's bad. I would be like, it's hard. Yeah. And I don't know if that is that part of your, but yeah. You don't have to deal with that part or do you It's It's still hard.

No, I know it's hard, but I mean that part of it, like you don't have to deal with like having to do something and not knowing whether or not you'll make money or having to like deal with someone who's being difficult and feeling like you can't necessarily avoid them completely or make them leave.

Mistress March: They don't get to be in my physical presence necessarily.

But there are still a thousand people out there who wanna waste your time and objectify you and disregard your boundaries, and they feel entitled to your time and your attention, your response to a dm, et cetera. Mm-hmm. That's, it's absolutely always still there.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Yeah. I didn't mean to insinuate what you do is not difficult as hell.

No, I didn't take it that way whatsoever. Okay. I think all chapters of sex work are like intensely difficult.

Mistress March: Yeah.

So I think navigating the world that we live in as a woman

Molly the Mormon Stripper: mm-hmm.

Mistress March: Is intensely difficult. Yes. This is just a particular set of challenges.

Molly the Mormon Stripper: Mm-hmm.

Mistress March: Yeah,

Molly the Mormon Stripper: I would agree.

[: 01:01:04

Mistress March: All right, we're gonna wrap part one here. We obviously have so much more to talk about, so make sure you tune back in for part two. We're gonna talk about the regulation and the legal landscape. And then we're also gonna talk about women being in charge, and sisterhood and solidarity between us. Thank you so much, Molly. Of course.

In the meantime, if you'd like to contact Molly.

You can find her on Instagram at MollyTheStripper, through her podcast "ASK THE STRIPPER" or in person. Best of all, at Molly's Gemini room in Salt Lake City, Utah to reach me. Mistress March. Search Mistress March or Radioactive March on Instagram, FetLife, or Google. or send an email to hello at mistress on the mic.com. Till next time, darling. Stay freaky.